Skip to main content

Scott Stapp & Fatherhood

Go back with me.  Think back to a day before skinny jeans; a day when hair was spiked and tips were frosted; an era that saw stars wear matching denim outfits and "reality TV" break onto the scene; a day when pop music often featured actual instruments.

Yes, those were the days!

Those were the days when Creed ruled the airwaves and Scott Stapp was the coolest dude on the planet (and saying dude was still sort of cool).

Well, fast forward two decades and the world is a very different place.  The music is very different, but musical differences reflect the greater cultural differences.  Amidst all the changes, however, one thing remains--Scott Stapp is still making music!  He may not be cool anymore, but he is still a talented artist and he's still making quality music.

His most recent effort, The Space Between the Shadows, was released on 7/19.  As a Scott Stapp fanboy I had to get it as soon as humanly possible, and I'm not talking about a stupid digital download--no, I need a physical CD (for you Millennials, that's a compact disc).  This album marks a return to form for Stapp, who played with different sounds on his preceding solo effort, but after receiving good reviews with Art of Anarchy, realized that he is and will always be a hard rocker.

What is, perhaps, unique on this album is his transparency.  Of course, Scott Stapp has always poured his heart--his pain and his joy--into his music, both vocally and lyrically, but there is a sense of resolution and clarity on this album that his previous work lacked.  This album is pervaded by a sense of peace, of coming to terms with who he is and has been.

The song that best illustrates this change is Name.  It is one of the best songs on the album, both artistically and emotionally.  The opening lyrics confesses
The time has come to break the silence, To tell the truth behind the rage,
The years of living in denial, The time has come to turn the page.
He declares his intention of being honest with himself.  It is finally time to face the past.  After years of scandals and substance abuse, he is ready to deal with the underlying issue.  He is finally healing.

And what lay behind his rage all along?  The chorus informs us that
I am a son without a father, He gave his name and walked away.
Daddy issues.

It's a cliche as old as Adam & Eve, but an absent father remains one of the most powerfully destructive forces in society nevertheless.  Being abandoned by his father, his namesake, laid the foundation for his own instability and broken relationships.  He doesn't shift the blame for his sins, but he does recognize and own the pain behind them.

As if being abandoned by one's father wasn't bad enough, Scott Stapp was then abused--physically, emotionally, and spiritually--by his step-father, an unassuming dentist who was supposed to be the harbinger of stability and healing for the broken family.  First he was abandoned by a man who was uninterested in him, then he was controlled by a man whom he couldn't escape!

Reading Scott Stapp's autobiography and listening to his music leaves one with an inescapable impression that many of America's problems are directly or indirectly linked to the prevalence of fathers refusing to be fathers, or perhaps, not knowing how to be fathers.  It is impossible to overestimate the effect that spineless, impotent men have had on Western civilization in this postmodern, postfeministic age.  The absence of fathers in homes, literally or practically, has had dire consequences economically, morally, and sociologically.  Adults don't know how to work; kids don't know what gender they are; dependence on the State is unprecedented.  The absence of strong, male, servant leadership is at least partially to blame for these cultural crises. 

As a father I find this song, and Scott Stapp's story as a whole, challenging.  I know that there is nothing that I can do to guarantee the spiritual and emotional health of my four children, but I can be sure that any apathy and/or abuse on my part would create barriers thereto.  Those of us who were blessed with attentive fathers, whatever their defects, should thank our Heavenly Father for their presence in our lives.  Those who shared Scott Stapp's experience should examine their own lives and reflect on how it has affected them.

Regardless of what we experienced during our childhoods, we should all echo Scott Stapp's resolution:
I am a man, now a father,
 And I swear my son,
Will never know that pain. 




















Comments

Popular posts from this blog

4 Reasons I Affirm Paedocommunion

If you have interacted with me on social media, you know that I have always been outspoken on the issue of Paedocommunion .  It is a theological position and a liturgical practice about which I am passionate.  Having been raised, and having raised my children, at the Table, I cannot imagine attending a church that didn't allow PC.  I hope that when I am old and gray, I will still be an advocate for bringing little children to the Sacrament. Throughout the 12 years that I have had this blog, I have written scattered thoughts on the topic, but it appears that I have never written a concise summary of my reasons for affirming PC.  I was thoroughly convinced that I had, but I can't seem to locate it, so I guess I never did.  So, to rectify the omission, here are four reasons I hold to PC. 1) Paedocommunion is Biblical.   Any discussion of the topic should start here, and I would hope that both sides of the debate would make this assertion.  However, let me clarify what I mean when

1 Corinthians, the Covenant Hermeneutic, & Paedocommunion

As an adherent to Paedocommunion  (hereafter PC), I have always found it painfully ironic that Credocommunionists use 1 Corinthians 11 to withhold children (among others) from the Table.  One can imagine St. Paul shaking his head as he watches theologians using his discussion of unity at the Table to divide the body at the Table.  You're missing the point! he would say in exasperation.  Not only does 1 Corinthians 11 not forbid PC; I would go so far as to say that there is no better defense of PC in the New Testament than the epistle of 1 Corinthians. Credocommunionist logic is pretty straightforward.  1 Corinthians 11:28 says, "Let a person examine himself, then, and so eat of the bread and drink of the cup."  If, they argue, one is unable to fulfill the exhortation to examine himself, then he may not eat of the bread and drink of the cup.  This is a pretty logical deduction, right? Credobaptists would adamantly agree.  Acts 2:38 says, "Repent and be baptized...&quo

Why do you go to church on Sunday?

Why do you go to church on Sunday?  I would assume there are many reasons, but what is the primary reason that you get up on a cold, snowy Sunday morning and get your butt to church?  Further, why has the Church of Jesus Christ consistently gathered together on Sundays (among other days) for the last 2000 years? Throughout my 34 years of church attendance I would have proffered a variety of answers to that question.  As a child I'm sure I went to church because I had to, to see my cousins (who happened to be my best friends), to get bread and wine (weekly communion for the win), etc.  As my faith matured in adulthood these reasons remained, hopefully deepening, but to them were added concepts like rest and theological training. As I moved into Anglicanism I was struck by the deliberate focus on worship .  Why do Christians gather on Sunday morning?  To worship God!  Are teaching and fellowship important?  Absolutely!  Are they aspects of worship?  Certainly!  Is either the primary