You're going back to Rome!
Theological disagreements within the Reformed world, especially those of the last half century, often devolve into these sorts of accusations. As controversialists like Doug Wilson and Peter Leithart began to break away from the larger conservative Presbyterian and Reformed denominations, it became clear that the rift was deeper than semantics and systematic minutiae.
Much like the Reformation four centuries before, the Table was a primary point of conflict.
What does it mean? Who may partake? What do we call it?
These questions, along with a few more, divided Reformed brethren as the physical elements of our religion reflected deeper conflicts. Good men began to understand that the problem wasn't just in our logos, but in our pathos and ethos, as well.
Paedocommunion (hereafter PC) has been one of the hottest points of contention. PC has always been normal to me as I grew up with it. I understood why other Presbyterians didn't practice it, but I never understood why they felt so strongly about it. As I began to engage with wider circles of Presbyterian and Reformed brethren, I experienced serious hostility, even to the point of being labeled a heretic (the fact that some prioritize assent to TULIP over many other historical and theological markers, getting along better with Reformed Baptists than with PCers, I found to be very telling). Through these experiences I began to understand the depth of the rift.
There has been a tendency for those who practice PC to hold more literal (traditional? catholic?) views of the Real Presence of Christ in the Eucharist. This has led some to suggest that we hold an ex opera operato view of the Sacrament. We, they accuse, believe that communion with God is accomplished by the mere eating and drinking of the elements. What about faith? What about understanding?
It is only fair to acknowledge this correlation. Most PCers I know do also have stronger, more literal views of what is happening at the Eucharist. Correlation, however, does not equal causality. So how are we to understand this correlation?
I can only speak for myself, but I believe that the real misunderstanding--the real difference--has more to do with how we understand human nature, personal piety, and our Faith as a whole. This is the deeper rift.
Instead of explaining, allow me to illustrate. Another practice commonly found alongside PC is weekly communion. When our Reformed Presbyterian church was closing in '20, we visited a local PCA congregation where we have friends and family. Now, I love my brethren there, so don't misunderstand me when I say that visiting once was enough to convince me that I was never going to fit in there. The absence of the Table was palpable. When we visited a local ACNA parish, we knew we had found home. It was not just the weekly observance of communion, but the centrality of the Eucharist, that captured the Spencer family.
This difference carried further into the life of the parish, diocese, province, etc. The Anglican Communion, at least those within it who are trying to reclaim orthodoxy, emphasizes Formation. I grew up in the Reformed world hearing the word Sanctification, which is a fine word, properly understood, but it was usually equated with learning more and becoming holier. Again, those two things are important, but Sanctification was often presented in a mechanistic way. The head was prioritized over the heart, or, put more fairly, the head was viewed as the gateway to the heart. Anglican spirituality recognizes that the inverse is, in fact, the Biblical model. If you want change, if you want growth, you have to start with the heart. Sanctification isn't just about knowing more and sinning less--it's about loving God more and more, and letting that love control our actions more and more.
All this is not to say that Reformed churches don't understand this concept. Many Reformed churches, pastors, etc. believe this and live it out. However--and here's the crux--this emphasis is not built into the structures of their worship. Three songs and a sermon communicates that the intellect is the primary faculty of human personhood. Hour-long sermons that preclude the regular observance of the Lord's Supper eloquently imply that the mind is more important than the body. Replacing the seasons of the Church Calendar with 10-week sermon series says that propositional truth is more important than formative rhythm. Rejecting Saints' Days, along with naming our churches after doctrines instead of forefathers in the Faith, proclaims to the world that the Church is first and foremost a group of people that believe certain things about God.
The Reformers and their disciples were admirably trying to avoid certain ditches, but they discovered a whole separate set of ditches. I thank God that many Reformed churches are beginning to recognize this and reengage with some of the ancient traditions of the Church in helpful ways. The baby, it turns out, need not be jettisoned with the bathwater.
I know I've covered quite a bit of ground here, so allow me to summarize my meandering rant.
Even those who most staunchly believe in the Real Presence acknowledge that true communion with God involves faith, understanding, etc. However, we do insist that we are not disembodied spirits, nor is our religion merely intellectual or even spiritual. God, knowing how He created us, has mercifully provided physical signs to help us understand His Gospel and to grow in our Faith. These rituals, which we call Sacraments, are neither empty signs nor magical rites--they are places where the physical and spiritual realms collide. The physical and spiritual are equally important--equally real. God has given us physical acts that, when used properly, allow us to commune with Him and grow in grace. Baptism unites us to Christ and His Church. Through the Eucharist we transcend time and space to commune with and be renewed by the Triune God and the Church catholic. Accordingly, the Eucharist has since apostolic times been the center of Christian worship.
So, this is the correlation between PC and a belief in the Real Presence. True worship involves all of our faculties--our bodies, souls, minds, hearts, etc. To replace a holistic worship service with an intellectual exercise--even good, Biblical preaching--is to lose the powerfully formative effects of liturgy. This is why we celebrate the Eucharist weekly. This is why we believe that it holds true power to bless, as well as to curse. This is why we give it to our children.
We raise our children with the Eucharist, not simply because we believe that children can have faith and can spiritually commune with God, but because we want them to be formed by it--to grow from cradle to grave in an understanding of what it means to know, love, and obey God.
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